Sagaai
The Sagaai is the engagement ceremony and begins when the
bride-to-be arrives at the groom-to-be’s place with the matli, a
package that represents good luck. The matli is a container which is
now often made of steel and contains sweets and gifts for the groom
and his family. This symbolizes the bride’s family’s acceptance of
the union of their daughter and the groom-to-be. There is then a
short ceremony where five women from each side of the family bless
the couple-to-be which represents a promise between the two
families.
Garba
The Garba is usually held the night before the wedding and involves
plenty of dancing. It provides the opportunity for the each side of
the family to meet, greet and have some fun before the wedding
begins. The main event is the Raas which is a dance involving pairs
of people and dandia sticks. The dance involves hitting your
partner's sticks while following the rhythm of the music. The Garba
is also an ideal place for future couples to meet and begin their
own stories.
Pithi
This is a ceremony where the both the bride and groom are covered in
a yellow powder that is made into paste. The bride and groom have
their own ceremonies and usually invite their close family and
friends. The Pithi is used to cleanse the bride and groom before the
wedding day. The paste is said to brighten and soften the skin to
produce that healthy glow.
Mehndi
On this occasion the bride’s hands and feet are adorned with mehndi,
or henna. Female family and friends are also invited to have their
hands adorned.
Mandap Mahurat
This is a typical ceremony performed before many auspicious events.
The Pundit performs this puja in the bride and groom’s homes a few
days before the wedding. The families pray to Lord Ganesh and seek
His blessings.
Griha Shanti
This puja is also conducted by a Pandit and the date and time is
chosen by matching the horoscopes of the bride and groom to-be. This
prayer is conducted with the bride and groom’s family members and
relatives. This pooja seeks to provide the couple with a happily
married life by calling happiness and peace from the stars.
Wedding Ceremony
Baraat
The groom arrives at the wedding ceremony location with his baraat
of family and friends. Many grooms choose to arrive on horseback or
in a horse and carriage. The Baraat gathers together and everyone
dances in celebration. Traditionally Gujarati’s did not marry
someone from their own town so the baraat signified the groom
entering the bride’s village.
Ponkvu
The arrival of the groom, or the Ponkvu, is the official start of
the Gujurati wedding. The groom is welcomed by his mother-in-law at
the entrance. She will perform the aarti and will playfully try to
grab his nose. This tradition reminds the groom that he has come
rubbing his nose at their door asking for their daughter’s hand in
marriage.
Jaimala
Some Gujaratis will then bring the bride out and she will exchange
garlands with her groom-to-be. This is called the Jaimala ceremony.
The groom is traditionally lifted higher than the bride during this
exchange. In modern times this is done by the groom’s friends to
show that the bride cannot take the groom from his friends and
family.
Madhuparka
The groom is welcomed to the mandap by his future mother-in-law. In
the madhuparka the groom’s feet are washed and he is offered honey
and milk. It is at this time that the saalis (sister-in-law) will
try to steal the groom’s shoes. Traditionally the groom must leave
the wedding with the same pair of shoes that he enters with. If his
shoes are stolen, he must offer the sisters money in order to get
them back.
Kanya Agamana
The bride is led to the mandap by her maternal uncle. When she
reaches the mandap, there is an antarpaat (curtain) which separates
her from her groom. The acharya begins the ceremony and the
antarpaat is lowered and couple exchanges garlands. The wedding
ceremony takes place in front of a sacred fire and is conducted by
the pundit.
Kanya Daan
This ritual is when the bride is given away by her parents and the
bride’s hand is placed over the groom’s. The bride’s parents do not
eat before the wedding to make themselves pure for the occasion. In
essence, the bride’s parents are handing over the Goddess Laxmi
(their daughter) to Lord Vishnu (the groom).
Hasta Milap
The groom’s scarf is ties to the bride’s saree which symbolizes the
union of their two souls. The acharya chants mantras to invoke the
blessings of Goddess Laxmi and Goddess Parvati for the bride. The
relatives also come together to bless the couple and shower grains
of rice and rose petals on them.
Varmala
In this ceremony a cord is tied around the couple’s necks to protect
them from evil. These cords are traditionally tied by the elders of
the bride and groom.
Mangal Pheras
The bride and groom circle the sacred fire four times, signifying
the four basic human goals of Dharma, Artha, Kama and Moksha.
Meanwhile, the acharya chants mantras and the groom also recited
them. As a fun tradition, at the end of the pheras the bride and
groom will run to sit down first. It is said that the one who finds
a seat first will rule the house.
Saptapadi
The groom helps the bride touch seven betel nutes with her right
toe, while they recite the seven vows. With each step, the groom
chants mantras in which he requests support from his wife.
Saubhagyavati Bhava
In this tradition, seven married women from the bride’s side will
pass by the couple at this time and whisper blessings into the
bride’s right ear.
Chero Pakaryo
Traditionally, when the bride’s mother passes, the groom will tug at
her sari as a way of asking the bride’s family for gifts.
Ashirwaad
The Gujurati wedding concludes with the Ashirwaad in which the
couple asks for the blessings of their elders.
Post-Wedding
Vidaai
This ceremony sees the departure of the newly married couple and
involves tears of joy and sadness. The bride is often carried out by
her brothers.
Ghar Nu Laxmi
The couple then leaves for the groom’s home. The bride is welcomed
into the home as the Goddess Laxmi who will bring good fortune to
her new home. The mother-in-law places a vessel filled with rice at
the entrance to the home. The bride will then spill the rice from
the vessel by touching it with her right foot. This is a symbol of
wealth and the bride accepts her responsibilities towards her new
home.
Aeki Beki
The couple will then often play a game called Aeki Beki in which a
tray of water is mixed with milk and sindoor (vermilion). In this
tray are placed several coins and a ring. It is believed that the
person who finds the ring four out of seven times will rule the
household. The day is concluded with prayers to God requesting
happiness and love for the newly married couple.
