Indian weddings are very bright events, filled with
ritual and celebration, that continue for several days. They are not
small affairs, often with 400-1000 people attending (many of whom
are unknown to the bride and groom). Though most Indian marriages
are arranged, some couples in urban areas have love marriages. The
true Indian wedding is about two families getting wedded socially
with much less emphasis on the individuals involved.
Many of the wedding customs are common among the Hindus, Jains,
Sikhs and even Muslims. They are a combination of local, religions
and family traditions.
Traditions
Wedding traditions vary across religion, caste, ethnicity, language, region, etc. Traditional Indian weddings are generally structured into pre-wedding ceremonies, wedding day ceremonies (consisting of the Baraat, the Varmala and the Phere), and the Vidaai.
An example of the complexity of an Indian wedding can be seen from the various phases of a wedding in the North. The following events take place in a typical Eastern Uttar Pradesh Hindu marriage:
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Bariksha is when the bride's parents have informally shown
intentions that they want a particular groom, and the groom and his
family have agreed. Retracting at the end of this stage is frowned
upon but is acceptable.
Tilak involves the bride's parents traveling to the groom's place to formalize the relationship. A large feast is organized by the groom's family to celebrate this occasion. Only a nominal number of members of the bride's family are present (usually only very close relatives, often in tens of numbers. Typically, the female marriage proposal is very rare.
Byaha Haath: This ceremony signifies the purifying of the mind, body and soul of bride and groom. This daytime ceremony prepares both of them for the nuptials. 'Uptan' is a mixed paste of sandalwood, turmeric and rose water which is applied by seven unmarried female members of the families and to the faces, hands and feet of the bride and groom. After this ceremony the bride and the groom are not allowed to step outside the house before the actual wedding.